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Love the Life you've got now (while you work to improve it)


Sue Courtney explains how to create a more successful you

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Published Date: 30 July 2008
On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your life at the moment? I imagine not many of you can honestly say ten to all areas of your life – it just doesn't work like that, does it?
There are usually one or two areas that are working better than others and a few that need a complete overhaul. But what can you do about it? In her book "Simple Abundance. A Daybook of Comfort and Joy" by Sarah Ban Breathnach suggests that you bloo
m where you are planted. Right at this moment you may not have the perfect career, home or relationship but you do have the opportunity to make it as good as you possibly can today, and plan how you are going to improve it further tomorrow.

Recently I introduced my local Chamber of Commerce to the Wheel of Life, a coaching tool to structure an assessment of how each area of your life or business is doing. It then leads on to developing an action plan to improve the situation and move closer to the life you truly want. Blooming where you are, or making the most of your current life is a good place to start, but there is absolutely no reason to accept it as your lot in life. Using the Wheel of Life you can begin to plan small adjustments that will lead you to achieve the life you would like.

The wheel of life is a circle, divided into six segments, each of which is further divided into 5 sections. The first step is to decide which area of your life or business you will assign to each segment. You could choose career, finance, family, relationships, leisure, home – whatever seems appropriate to you.

For each area of life you then decide what perfection would look like and feel like to you. You can't make your life perfect for someone else, only you. Let them sort out their own life, this is for you and you alone. So if one area is home, what would your ideal home look like? Where would it be? How many rooms would it have? How would the house be furnished? What would the garden look like? Make it as real and inspiring as possible. Then ask yourself why you want it to be like this? What is the essence of the vision? Is it 'old world charm' when you currently live on the fourth floor of a modern apartment block or 'modern minimalist' when you are juggling the demands of full time work and four children? If you know the essence of what you are trying to achieve then you may be able to introduce little aspects of it into your current life to make things a little more bearable.

If leisure is an area you have chosen to focus on, ask what you would love to do with your leisure if time and money were no object? Would you eat out more, go to shows or concerts, have several holidays a year, join a golf club or go windsurfing or horse riding or dancing? Then ask yourself what is the core reason? What is the feeling you will have when you are able to spend your leisure doing what you love? Once you know the essence of the activity ask how you can inject a little of that into your leisure now. What could you do now to give a bit of that feeling?

Ok, you get the idea. The next section asks you to rate your current life against the goal of perfection which you identified in the previous section. One indicates that nothing works and the area needs a complete overhaul. Ten indicates that perfection has already been attained. If you join all the numbers up around the wheel you may end up with a fairly even circle at about 5 or 6. You may, though, have a rather jagged circle with some peaks and troughs. This will indicate the areas of your life which need most urgent action and those which are not too bad at present.

Outside the wheel are a series of boxes labelled 'Strengths'. There is one box for each segment of the wheel. In each box you can list everything that is working in each area. What is quite good? What could you build on? In home you could list that you actually have a home or a room that you can work on. In leisure it may be that you actually have an hour or so to call your own each week. Dig deep and be as positive as possible. They say you get more of what you focus on so maximise the good.

So now you know what perfection would look and feel like, you know how life currently rates and you have identified what is currently good in your life. Next you go round the wheel and ask the question
"If there was just one thing I could do that would move me a small step closer to my goal of perfection in this area what would it be?"
If more than one idea comes to mind then list them and decide which you feel most compelled to do. At the moment they are just ideas that you could do if you chose to. What would have to do to cause some positive change?
What one thing could you do to get the process started?

What are the barriers that may stop you from taking this action or achieving your goal in this area of life? This is a really important aspect of the process so please don't skimp on it. The barriers may be physical such as not living in the right sort of house or not having any spare time. They may also be self imposed limiting beliefs that you need to identify and deal with before you can successfully achieve your goals. Whatever they turn out to be, take them seriously and give them the attention they require. If you know what you are dealing with you are better able to take the appropriate action. If you don't have any spare time then you might consider reorganising your time, re-prioritising tasks and delegating. If you don't live in the right sort of house could you do a bit of clever decorating and accessorising? If you have limiting beliefs then take advice from Anthony Robbins. He says that beliefs are like a table top, they have to be supported by a certain number of legs or evidence. The trick is to destroy the legs of the beliefs by finding enough evidence to the contrary. Then make a new, empowering belief and actively seek evidence to support the new belief. It may take time but it will be well worth the effort.

The final step is to list all the actions you need to take to reach ten in each area and do something each day to move you towards that goal. Paul McKenna suggests making a time line to show the steps you will have to have taken in order to get from where you are to where you want to be. This is not a quick process but you may find that by focussing on one area for a while – maybe the one that will have the biggest impact on your life, or the one that seems easiest to start with – other areas will be improved as a result. Life is, after all, interconnected and creating the life you truly want should be a lifetimes work. There will always be new goals to achieve to replace the goals achieved. Enjoy the journey it is all part of your life and you deserve to have the life you want.

One final thought, for now – if you find yourself stuck and you are struggling to achieve a goal it could be that your goal and your values are in conflict. Your goal may be to embark on a risky financial venture when your key value around finances is stability. Take some time to discover your core values in relation to each area on the wheel and ask yourself whether your goals are compatible with your values.

If you would like to receive a free copy of the Wheel of Life by email attachment or post and a copy of the instructions please contact Sue Courtney by phone on 01730 814439 or email at sue@successandimage.co.uk




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  • Last Updated: 30 July 2008 10:06 AM
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  • Location: Petersfield
 
 

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