Over the past year, I have had a lot of experiences which have shaped me and given me an opportunity to think deeply about myself and certain situations.
It has literally been the best year of my life but within that has been a few of the worst months of my life. I’m not going to go into detail about my own personal experiences, because we have all had ups and downs this year, but the most important thing is how we react to these situations and how we let them develop us as individuals and how they shape our future actions and mindset.
One of the main things I’ve learnt is that life is about the journey and less about the destination. I have had a lot of experiences throughout this year where I have felt pressure to meet my goals and get to certain points in my personal life and also my career.
This is because we get so focused on big dreams we forget to enjoy the journey while we work towards our goal.
One of my biggest achievements this year is to give myself the chance to be present in everything I do and enjoy ‘every step on the way to the top of the staircase’. I no longer feel pressure to succeed straight away and I’ve stopped comparing myself to others and how they are progressing as we are all on a different path.
Forgiveness is something which won’t come naturally. It’s something you can introduce to yourself to give to others who have done wrong in your life. Forgiveness isn’t a sign of weakness, it gives us the chance to put negativity and anger behind us and allow us to move forward in life without holding grudges.
There have been a few situations this year where I have questioned people’s intentions and felt anger towards them because of some of their decisions which have affected me deeply.
It is very easy to hold grudges and hold on to anger for this person but one thing I have learnt is by doing this, they have moved on and are no longer thinking about the situation while you are still filled with anger – and it affects you a lot more than it affected them, even if they caused it.
Forgiveness is a gift which you give yourself. When friends test your forgiveness, you have to ask yourself if your friendship is more important than the issue. You have to weigh up if you are able to forgive, and move on with the friendship or if the issue is a ‘deal breaker’ for your relationship. I have closed off a few friendships this year once realising the toxicity within some people.
This is a hard concept as you are losing a friend. However, if their actions have been emotionally draining you for some time, closing off this friendship is going to allow you to have personal development and open the door for new friendships. Just remember to close the door with forgiveness or you will always have a negative thought lingering in your mind.
As this year ends, take time to reflect and set yourself goals and resolutions for the year ahead.
By Amber Rose Shaw